Last night I had a grown up moment. A breakthrough.
I found out a few days ago that some friends from across the country would be in Vegas this week. They invited me to come hang out with them, stay for free with them in their suite. I waffled a minute and then checked flights - some good deals available. I was 5 seconds away from clicking the "purchase" button on the Southwest.com website.
But I paused. Something didn't feel right.
Could I swing the trip financially? Sure. Take a little from here and there. Would it be better to put that money towards eliminating my debt, upgrading my house or fixing my car? YES.
It's not that I'm never spontaneous. In fact, all 2008 my focus was on doing things that made me happy since I had been an unhappy person. I went on trips, happy hours, dinners out, and bought whatever I wanted. Now, a year later, I'm dealing with credit card debt that I haven't had in YEARS.
Thing that I have to remember is that Vegas isn't going anywhere. Would I like to hang out with my friends? Sure, we'd have fun. But would I feel guilty about not spending the money I spent on my flight on a new battery for my car? Yes, I would. And I should. I am less than 4 months away from being 31. As Carrie said on "King of Queens" last night, "When you're in your 30s, being broke is not cute anymore."
This also brings me to my New Orleans trip . . . I've been giving that some thought. Especially in light of my mounting bills, my failing car and my desire to be free of debt. New Orleans isn't going anywhere - even after Hurricane Katrina, it's still standing. And the Essence festival happens every year. Plus, I'm not super duper excited about seeing Beyonce . . .
So I made some decisions. No traveling this year. I need to focus on eliminating debt and those practical things in my life that I sometimes ignore because of the potential for fun.
As sad as I will be to miss Vegas this week and New Orleans in July, the idea of one less thing I have to save or pay for is such a relief . . .
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Let the Spinnin' Wheel Fly
So my quest for a physical activity I like continues . . . my latest: spinning.
Last night I tried my first spin class at Gold's Gym. Normally it is taught by Janie, but word on the street is that Janie angled too hard for a raise and is no longer with Gold's Gym Oakland. Ahem.
The class wasn't packed, but it was full. I nervously hopped on a bike and the instructor (Gisele - who looked like she did the Tour de France at one point in her life) promptly informed me that she needed to find the right fit for me on the bike. She adjusted the settings on my bike and a couple others, and we all got on and pedaled slowly.
Gisele then explained to us her 14 years of experience with spinning (apparently her friend Johnny G created spinning 20 years ago), as well as what spinning was and what it wasn't. She insisted spinning was not doing push ups on the bike. That would not be going down in her class. I don't know about the other people in the room, but I breathed a sigh of relief.
So we get on and start pedaling away. Gisele calls us "Champs" collectively - until she knows our names, she says, we are deemed "Champs." Throughout the next 45 minutes Gisele tells us to "gear up" (I had no idea what that was), or stand up on the bike or increase the resistance. Meanwhile, the "computer" as Gisele calls it on my bike is not working. It's not working for the chick next to me either. We both shrug and assume we are going 90 mph as Gisele has requested.
At some point, I get a pain in the back of my left knee but I keep pedaling. It is frustrating to pedal when a.) you have no idea how fast you're going or how far you've traveled and b.) you're not going anywhere.
I certainly feel it today - my butt is sore, my thighs are achy and my calves are tight. But I'm not thinking spinning is my calling. There is a belly dancing class on Sundays though . . .
Last night I tried my first spin class at Gold's Gym. Normally it is taught by Janie, but word on the street is that Janie angled too hard for a raise and is no longer with Gold's Gym Oakland. Ahem.
The class wasn't packed, but it was full. I nervously hopped on a bike and the instructor (Gisele - who looked like she did the Tour de France at one point in her life) promptly informed me that she needed to find the right fit for me on the bike. She adjusted the settings on my bike and a couple others, and we all got on and pedaled slowly.
Gisele then explained to us her 14 years of experience with spinning (apparently her friend Johnny G created spinning 20 years ago), as well as what spinning was and what it wasn't. She insisted spinning was not doing push ups on the bike. That would not be going down in her class. I don't know about the other people in the room, but I breathed a sigh of relief.
So we get on and start pedaling away. Gisele calls us "Champs" collectively - until she knows our names, she says, we are deemed "Champs." Throughout the next 45 minutes Gisele tells us to "gear up" (I had no idea what that was), or stand up on the bike or increase the resistance. Meanwhile, the "computer" as Gisele calls it on my bike is not working. It's not working for the chick next to me either. We both shrug and assume we are going 90 mph as Gisele has requested.
At some point, I get a pain in the back of my left knee but I keep pedaling. It is frustrating to pedal when a.) you have no idea how fast you're going or how far you've traveled and b.) you're not going anywhere.
I certainly feel it today - my butt is sore, my thighs are achy and my calves are tight. But I'm not thinking spinning is my calling. There is a belly dancing class on Sundays though . . .
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Guys and Diets
So what I have realized is there are two types of reactions when a dude hears you're on a diet . . .
There's the "You-Don't-Need-to-Go-On-No-Diet-Girl-You-Look-Good" dude. At first it may appear that this guy is your one true friend. But in reality this is your most selfish friend and he should NOT be trusted. Because this is the dude that probably really enjoys a particular part of your body (most likely your boobs or butt) and is more concerned that a diet will somehow diminish your rump or your cup, than concerned about your health. He probably doesn't notice your muffin top because he's too busy looking at other body parts. Don't trust this man.
But then there's the other the dude. I'll call him Mr. Helpful. Now his initial response to your "I'm on a diet" announcement is "Great! I can train/cook for/lift weights with you." He is probably all about fitness and health himself and has secretly thought for YEARS that you should drop some weight, but never had the guts to tell you. This is also the guy that can be very annoying. Case in point, my coworker is a Mr. Helpful. Here's what happened when we went to lunch last week:
ME: Hey the cafe downstairs now has pastrami sandwiches! I am so getting a pastrami sandwich!
MY WORK MR. HELPFUL: Dude, pastrami is bad. Get a turkey sandwich.
ME: I hate you. How bout I get a salad, you jerk?
I appreciate how a Mr. Helpful reminds me that every meal counts and points out how food that I don't think is that bad is a lot worse than I think. But sometimes I can't stand him - especially my Work Mr. Helpful because last week I really wanted that pastrami. In his defense, the salad I ate was pretty good and I had an unprecedented weight loss last week (I have maintained it for a week, too!).
Here's what happened when another Mr. Helpful took a look in my refrigerator (which mind you, is NOT THAT BAD):
Mr. Helpful: What is this? Salami? Muenster cheese? Olives? Girl, you can't eat ANY of this!
I mean, it's not like he found some soda or ho-hos or corn dogs in there. Are olives REALLY that bad??
In the end, I appreciate the Mr. Helpfuls in my life. They're not Mr. Harps-About-the-Diet-All-the-Time. This is something that my female friends (well, mainly my FAMILY) do more than my male friends. Ms. Harps-About-the-Diet-All-the-Time is the person who is constantly reminding you you're on a diet. She's probably on one too (and you know how misery loves company). She is sending you articles about the difference between trans fat and whatever other fats there are. She is offering you carrots from her little Tupperware container. She is inviting you to Weight Watchers. She just makes it really hard to be around her, because you don't want your diet to be your LIFE. And she is so obsesses with the latest fad (no carbs, points, the lemonade diet, etc.) that she is really hard to even have a convo with.
I appreciate people who are just trying to be, well helpful. And that is the most important part.
(I'm wondering if anyone is going to get my reference to "Guys and Dolls" . . . )
There's the "You-Don't-Need-to-Go-On-No-Diet-Girl-You-Look-Good" dude. At first it may appear that this guy is your one true friend. But in reality this is your most selfish friend and he should NOT be trusted. Because this is the dude that probably really enjoys a particular part of your body (most likely your boobs or butt) and is more concerned that a diet will somehow diminish your rump or your cup, than concerned about your health. He probably doesn't notice your muffin top because he's too busy looking at other body parts. Don't trust this man.
But then there's the other the dude. I'll call him Mr. Helpful. Now his initial response to your "I'm on a diet" announcement is "Great! I can train/cook for/lift weights with you." He is probably all about fitness and health himself and has secretly thought for YEARS that you should drop some weight, but never had the guts to tell you. This is also the guy that can be very annoying. Case in point, my coworker is a Mr. Helpful. Here's what happened when we went to lunch last week:
ME: Hey the cafe downstairs now has pastrami sandwiches! I am so getting a pastrami sandwich!
MY WORK MR. HELPFUL: Dude, pastrami is bad. Get a turkey sandwich.
ME: I hate you. How bout I get a salad, you jerk?
I appreciate how a Mr. Helpful reminds me that every meal counts and points out how food that I don't think is that bad is a lot worse than I think. But sometimes I can't stand him - especially my Work Mr. Helpful because last week I really wanted that pastrami. In his defense, the salad I ate was pretty good and I had an unprecedented weight loss last week (I have maintained it for a week, too!).
Here's what happened when another Mr. Helpful took a look in my refrigerator (which mind you, is NOT THAT BAD):
Mr. Helpful: What is this? Salami? Muenster cheese? Olives? Girl, you can't eat ANY of this!
I mean, it's not like he found some soda or ho-hos or corn dogs in there. Are olives REALLY that bad??
In the end, I appreciate the Mr. Helpfuls in my life. They're not Mr. Harps-About-the-Diet-All-the-Time. This is something that my female friends (well, mainly my FAMILY) do more than my male friends. Ms. Harps-About-the-Diet-All-the-Time is the person who is constantly reminding you you're on a diet. She's probably on one too (and you know how misery loves company). She is sending you articles about the difference between trans fat and whatever other fats there are. She is offering you carrots from her little Tupperware container. She is inviting you to Weight Watchers. She just makes it really hard to be around her, because you don't want your diet to be your LIFE. And she is so obsesses with the latest fad (no carbs, points, the lemonade diet, etc.) that she is really hard to even have a convo with.
I appreciate people who are just trying to be, well helpful. And that is the most important part.
(I'm wondering if anyone is going to get my reference to "Guys and Dolls" . . . )
Sunday, March 15, 2009
The Ides of March
Okay, so it is mid-March and it has suddenly occurred to me that I have about 4 months left to accomplish my goals. I thought it was time to revisit where I am on my "31 Things to Do Before 31 List."
I have already realized that it will be simply impossible to accomplish some of these items 4 months, much less a year (since I started the list shortly after I turned 30). So I thought I'd put them into categories: things I can do NOW (that for some reason I haven't), things I can do before I turn 31 on July 31, things that will take longer than 1 year to do, and the things I have completed.
I thought I'd start on the positive . . . the things I have completed (it's a short list):
I have already realized that it will be simply impossible to accomplish some of these items 4 months, much less a year (since I started the list shortly after I turned 30). So I thought I'd put them into categories: things I can do NOW (that for some reason I haven't), things I can do before I turn 31 on July 31, things that will take longer than 1 year to do, and the things I have completed.
I thought I'd start on the positive . . . the things I have completed (it's a short list):
- Get a bicycle
- Take vitamins daily - not only am I taking vitamins, I'm taking amino acids!
- Get carpets cleaned - okay, I need to do this again, but I did it in December
- Find a side gig - planning a marathon!
- Reduce junk food and fast food intake
- Cook one major meal each week
- Get a physical
- Get 30 minutes of physical activity at least 3 times/week
- Watch more documentaries and independent films - I made it my mission to see those small indies that got a lot of award attention like "Slumdog Millionaire," "Milk" and "The Wrestler" - I loved them all!
- Write a book - I got started, but I didn't like how it was going, so back to the drawing board!
- Eliminate credit card debt by 50%
- Increase balance in savings account
- Buy a desk - I totally found the desk I want, but it costs $3000 and I'm thinking considering #2&3 on this list, I probably should wait until I get this one accomplished
- Eliminate negative relationships - platonic, familial and romantic (I think it takes years to accomplish this)
- Make one home improvement - still not sure what to do . . .
There are the things I still have hope to do over the next 4 months:
- Go to New Orleans
- Lose at least 20 lbs - 17 to go!
- Stop wearing so much black
- Buy a pair of designer jeans
- Buy a large mirror for the dining room
- Perform in a stepshow - will accomplish this one this weekend!
- Pay off car - 2 more payments (of course now I need new brakes and a new battery so there goes that savings . . . )
- Complete family tree and send to family - I could do this right now, but I'm pretty sure I won't do it until I have a vacation
- Get more involved in church - I am torn between 2 churches now, so I'm not sure which to get involved in . . .
And these are the things I should be doing now, and have no excuse for not doing:
- Find a physical activity I enjoy doing - still haven't found anything to commit to
- Drink more water - I'm good while at work, but not at home
- Do sit-ups nightly
- Learn more about football
- Balance my checkbook weekly
- Read more - I'm thinking about changing this to read the Bible since that is what I have been doing lately
- Get a passport
Hold me accountable!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Got My Mind on My Calories, Calories on My Mind
So, now that I have decided to watch my caloric-intake, I am feeling a little more goal oriented. It's important to have a goal beyond "I want to be healthy." My goal is to drop 20 pounds and drop 2 sizes before I turn 31!
I googled around until I found www.my-calorie-counter.com. It's a website where I enter what I ate for the day and how much activity I did and it helps me keep track of how much of my diet is carbs v. protein v. fat. Now, I just started this week and I've been eating more carbs and fat than anything, but I'm getting better . . .
It helps a lot with making informed food choices. I got really excited today because by 5pm, I had like 1000 calories left for the day (in order to lose 1 pound a week, I have to eat less than 1830 calories/day). Today in the gym rather than counting the minutes left on the elliptical machine, I counted calories. I wanted to reach at least 200 before I got off.
I also was excited last week because two pairs of pants that ABSOLUTELY did not fit two months ago fit me. I mean, back in November/December when I put these on, it was PAINFUL and I couldn't wait to change. But this time, I had on the pants for several hours. Ran around town running errands in them. Even got a manicure. I don't think anyone besides me has noticed anything, but dammit, I'm a happy camper! They weren't loose or anything and I'm not going down a size, so the journey continues . . .
I googled around until I found www.my-calorie-counter.com. It's a website where I enter what I ate for the day and how much activity I did and it helps me keep track of how much of my diet is carbs v. protein v. fat. Now, I just started this week and I've been eating more carbs and fat than anything, but I'm getting better . . .
It helps a lot with making informed food choices. I got really excited today because by 5pm, I had like 1000 calories left for the day (in order to lose 1 pound a week, I have to eat less than 1830 calories/day). Today in the gym rather than counting the minutes left on the elliptical machine, I counted calories. I wanted to reach at least 200 before I got off.
I also was excited last week because two pairs of pants that ABSOLUTELY did not fit two months ago fit me. I mean, back in November/December when I put these on, it was PAINFUL and I couldn't wait to change. But this time, I had on the pants for several hours. Ran around town running errands in them. Even got a manicure. I don't think anyone besides me has noticed anything, but dammit, I'm a happy camper! They weren't loose or anything and I'm not going down a size, so the journey continues . . .
Friday, March 6, 2009
The Secret
So I figured out the secret key to my weight loss - being busy.
Today I was super busy. I was running here and there. Working, running errands, getting a physical. I had a small breakfast (a banana), a healthy lunch (the BEST Cobb salad) and I wasn't even really hungry by the time I got home. In fact, I didn't obsess about food the way I usually do.
When I say I obsess about food, I really do . . .
There was this time I had a craving for some Cool Ranch Doritos. I was at a conference for work. I sat there and listened to a union organizer tell a compelling interesting story about his life. But all I could think about was how good those damn Doritos would taste. I thought about the blue bag and how much I love to lick the spices of one side of the chip before I eat it. I considered how it would impact my job performance if I ran out and grabbed a bag. I contemplated the most inconspicuous way to leave the ballroom I was in so that no one would notice.
Seriously, it was crazy. But you get my point.
Today I didn't obsess about food. In fact I am a little disappointed I didn't eat more because I discovered an online food diary and I really wanted to calculate my calories for the day.
One of the reasons I've avoided going on an official diet is because I just don't want food to overwhelm my life. I want to enjoy it, not dread it. Today I ate for sustenance, not because I was bored or because TV commercials or Doritos billboards subliminally influenced me (I believe this for real - that's another blog post on the evils of the food industries marketing tactics).
Instead of thinking about what I was going to eat or what I couldn't eat, I thought about work and all that I needed to do this weekend. Ironically, I cried last night because I felt so overwhelmed with all that was on my plate between work, extracurricular activities, my fear of letting people down, my ambition and my commitment to making sure I have a social life. But today I felt good.
Boredom = Doritos
That is what I've learned.
Today I was super busy. I was running here and there. Working, running errands, getting a physical. I had a small breakfast (a banana), a healthy lunch (the BEST Cobb salad) and I wasn't even really hungry by the time I got home. In fact, I didn't obsess about food the way I usually do.
When I say I obsess about food, I really do . . .
There was this time I had a craving for some Cool Ranch Doritos. I was at a conference for work. I sat there and listened to a union organizer tell a compelling interesting story about his life. But all I could think about was how good those damn Doritos would taste. I thought about the blue bag and how much I love to lick the spices of one side of the chip before I eat it. I considered how it would impact my job performance if I ran out and grabbed a bag. I contemplated the most inconspicuous way to leave the ballroom I was in so that no one would notice.
Seriously, it was crazy. But you get my point.
Today I didn't obsess about food. In fact I am a little disappointed I didn't eat more because I discovered an online food diary and I really wanted to calculate my calories for the day.
One of the reasons I've avoided going on an official diet is because I just don't want food to overwhelm my life. I want to enjoy it, not dread it. Today I ate for sustenance, not because I was bored or because TV commercials or Doritos billboards subliminally influenced me (I believe this for real - that's another blog post on the evils of the food industries marketing tactics).
Instead of thinking about what I was going to eat or what I couldn't eat, I thought about work and all that I needed to do this weekend. Ironically, I cried last night because I felt so overwhelmed with all that was on my plate between work, extracurricular activities, my fear of letting people down, my ambition and my commitment to making sure I have a social life. But today I felt good.
Boredom = Doritos
That is what I've learned.
Baptism?
I think I have shared that this healthy living journey is not just about my physical health but my spiritual health as well. They are dual tracks, parallel journeys. Both entail sacrifice and commitment and being patient. One can help the other.
I went to church with one of my sorhority sisters a few weeks ago. It was the first Sunday and they did communion. Because I wasn't baptized, I couldn't participate. It made me think. What else am I missing out on because I'm not baptized?
Then I'm watching "Baldwin Hills," and two of the characters get baptized. I think to myself, "How are these 18 year olds coming into their spiritual awareness before me?"
I'm considering it now. I know I have to think about it more. I know I need to learn about it more. It is scary. I absolutely cannot slip once I make that commitment. That I know. But I also don't want to miss out on anything more because I haven't made a commitment to God.
I'll think about it . . .
I went to church with one of my sorhority sisters a few weeks ago. It was the first Sunday and they did communion. Because I wasn't baptized, I couldn't participate. It made me think. What else am I missing out on because I'm not baptized?
Then I'm watching "Baldwin Hills," and two of the characters get baptized. I think to myself, "How are these 18 year olds coming into their spiritual awareness before me?"
I'm considering it now. I know I have to think about it more. I know I need to learn about it more. It is scary. I absolutely cannot slip once I make that commitment. That I know. But I also don't want to miss out on anything more because I haven't made a commitment to God.
I'll think about it . . .
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Day 1 of Calorie Counting
Last night I decided I was going to start counting calories. I realized that although I have lost a little weight, it's not significant enough. Now I'm getting ready for my New Orleans trip (Jamaica isn't in the cards this year - not enough vacation time or money!). Granted, I certainly won't be on the beaches of New Orleans and I'm not getting ready for Mardi Gras so there is no reason to lift up my shirt in public. But I still want to be able to stroll down Canal Street in some shorts and a tank top and not get mistaken for an extra in an early Cash Money video (you know, before they had money to hire real video vixens and had to just get homegirls from the neighborhood) . . .
The first day of calorie counting did not go well. Why? I am not sure. I started off with a bowl of gluten-free cereal, with lowfat milk and fresh raspberries. It was great. And I of course forgot to write down how many calories were in a bowl of gluten-free cornflakes with milk and raspberries. But that's okay.
So I get to work and it's time for a snack (remember I have an 1.5 hour commute to work so by the time I get to my desk it's like 2-3 hours after my last meal). I eat a hard boiled egg. I asked my co-worker, "Do you know how many calories in a hard boiled egg?" She says no but that it has 5 grams of fat. Okay, I'm not doing well so far but it's only the morning.
I eat Indian food for lunch. No nutrition label, but it was GREAT. Lot of food too. I snack on a gluten-free power bar, some fruit and these nasty gluten-free lime-cilantro chips I got from Whole Foods. During step practice, I consume another gluten-free power bar which surprisingly does give me a little boost during step practice. I get home around 9pm and am not super hungry, but consider snacking on some green olives and cheese.
I have no idea how many calories I consumed today.
I must do better tomorrow. Stay tuned!
The first day of calorie counting did not go well. Why? I am not sure. I started off with a bowl of gluten-free cereal, with lowfat milk and fresh raspberries. It was great. And I of course forgot to write down how many calories were in a bowl of gluten-free cornflakes with milk and raspberries. But that's okay.
So I get to work and it's time for a snack (remember I have an 1.5 hour commute to work so by the time I get to my desk it's like 2-3 hours after my last meal). I eat a hard boiled egg. I asked my co-worker, "Do you know how many calories in a hard boiled egg?" She says no but that it has 5 grams of fat. Okay, I'm not doing well so far but it's only the morning.
I eat Indian food for lunch. No nutrition label, but it was GREAT. Lot of food too. I snack on a gluten-free power bar, some fruit and these nasty gluten-free lime-cilantro chips I got from Whole Foods. During step practice, I consume another gluten-free power bar which surprisingly does give me a little boost during step practice. I get home around 9pm and am not super hungry, but consider snacking on some green olives and cheese.
I have no idea how many calories I consumed today.
I must do better tomorrow. Stay tuned!
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