I am all "adviced" out.
I mean it. If I hear another person tell me what I should buy or do or say, I am going to SCREAM. I mean it. I am almost 9 months pregnant. I'm huge. I'm uncomfortable. It should go without saying that I have a very short fuse. Very, very short. Almost nonexistent.
And ironically, the people who give me the most advice? Women with no children.
Not that these women's words aren't valid. That's like saying that a single woman cannot give relationship advice. I don't believe that - often you're more objective about relationships when you're not in one. But I really don't need to hear from another broad whose experience with children is relegated to her sister/best friend/cousin. Especially at this stage of my pregnancy. I want to wear a shirt that says "Frankie Says Relax" or "I'm Not an Idiot. I Think I Can Figure it Out."
I think it is telling that women with children don't really give unsolicited advice. Now don't get me wrong - you get them started on something like breastfeeding or childcare or labor and they will go on and on. But I notice they don't say much unless you ask them. I am quite sure they understand first hand how not only annoying it can be for a pregnant woman, who is deluged with hundreds of different thoughts a day, to constantly received advice. I think women with children also know that every baby is different. And what worked for your sister Trish or your cousin Rita or your friend Tamika may not work for the next person (me).
I am 31. I have a Master's degree. I have a Blackberry and access to the Internet, Barnes & Noble and Kaiser. I have books. And most importantly I have a brain. For the love of all things holy, stop telling me I don't need pants for the baby. Stop suggesting I pick a certain type of sling. And please stop telling me I should get an epidural. I can figure out these things on my own. And you know what? I would really like to figure them out on my own.
To a certain extent I brought this on myself. I asked a lot of questions in the beginning. I made no secret that I wasn't an expert and that I hadn't been preparing for motherhood since I got my period. But damn - do I have "clueless" written on my forehead?
Look, I'll be able to figure it out. And if I don't know what to do, you know where I'll go for some advice? Google.
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Yeah I remember those days... but it gave me this perspective... everyone has a unique experience and yours will be yours! Hopefully you'll blog all about it because I like hearing birth stories =) But when the baby comes it does help to get advice from others on some things (so if the doc recommends iron supplements for your baby PLEASE email me first! You'll thank me).
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